Friday, January 4, 2013

A Lesson From the Past Year

Today is a pretty significant day for me in this whole little thing that is my new life. It doesn't matter exactly why but without January 4th of last year, my "new life" probably wouldn't have happened. As I think about that, I am also thinking about how much has changed for everyone around me in the last year and I am pretty excited about all of the changes that are to come in 2013.

In the past year I know people who have found love, lost love, gotten pregnant, given birth, lost a child, gotten a pet, lost a pet, moved, quit their jobs, lost many of their childhood memories and made new memories. I know people who have started businesses, failed businesses, sold a business and lost their businesses to a hurricane. Basically, I like all of you have experienced or know someone who has experienced pretty much every human emotion imaginable over the last twelve months.

This day a year ago I was excited to start a new job but very sad to leave St. Barth, I didn't like the way things went that week but also had a "feeling" about some things. That job wasn't exactly what I was thinking it would be - I ended up in a situation I never thought I would find myself, completely duped with my new boss being arrested very soon into my new gig - he ended up in prison and I ended up having to figure something else out - and FAST. It's a crazy story but without it, the next nine months wouldn't have happened.

This day a year ago, I said goodbye to my now husband and he was in the process of figuring out "us" you see I had already done that, but you know us women are sometimes quicker at coming to the right conclusion ;) He took some time to reflect on what it was he wanted and whether or not "we" were it. So he needed time and a little space.

The past few days I have seen many of the same folks that had dove with my husband a year ago. There was a hint of something in their faces when they saw me - surprise, delight, maybe even shock - they all had a similar reaction, something along the lines of "so, there have been some changes since we last saw each other." My reaction has been something along the lines of "um, yeah a little bit." In general they have all been very warm and seem truly happy for us.

I don't think I am so special - who's life DOESN'T change in a year? Who sits still and doesn't have SOMETHING happen? The thing is - LIFE happens. Sometimes it happens great sometimes it's not so great - but no matter what happens you have to live it. You have to deal with what's happening around you and ask - is this something that I am going to let get me down or am I going to learn/grow/move forward in a new and "better" way.

There were and still are a lot of people out there that think we made a mistake. But there seem to be more and more everyday that believe in us and maybe even give us a bit of credit as they realize that this was not easy. We have been through a lot in the past year. There have been times I wasn't so sure I could do this. At the end it has all been worth it. Every last bit of it. I learned a lot about myself during that time with my old boss and I am learning a lot about myself every day in my new environment. My husband has learned a lot about himself during his time of reflection.

Together we are learning how to be a better team and help each other when we can how we can. I'm very happy about the way things are turning out and I look forward to continuing to grow and learn as a couple and I honestly don't care so much any more about what other think about it all. We are the only two people who opinions really matter in all this so I'm just going to focus on that. We are entering the next stage of our relationship and I can't wait to see what the next 12 months bring.

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