Over the last couple of weeks I got to witness a lot of craziness that is part of the very high season here. The thing I took note of most was how parents and children were interacting with each other and over the last few weeks I have seen some awesome parenting and some parenting that left me furious. It's no secret I want a little one but I am also aware of the fact that I may have waited to long and may never get my wish. I think that's what some of what I witnessed got me so angry. I can't understand why parents who get so little time with their kids to begin with seem so bothered by them.
I covered in a previous post about what some of the very high season crowd looks like. It's the extraordinarily wealthy - people are dropping hundreds of thousands of dollars down to be here these two weeks. With the dive center a lot of times you get fathers wanting their kids to experience diving, and in many cases you are doing private trips with these folks so I really got to see some interesting interactions.
I'll start with the highlights - a family from NYC came and their 10 year old son wanted to try diving - neither parent had interest and the father actually told me when he dove last time it was a terrible experience and he didn't like it at all. But yet when his son did so well in the pool session and wanted to try it in the sea the dad didn't hesitate. So the dad, the grandfather and the little boy all came out together. It was a special day for them and I loved witnessing it. I loved that the dad focused on nothing but his son the whole time - following with a camera and diving even though it wasn't something he enjoyed - at the end he was happy because his son was happy and I would be willing to bet we see them next year.
Another family came back that I had met last year - father with four daughters and his wife. When they found out we got married everyone came back to pick up dad after his dive and sat around and chatted with us for a while. These two weeks you can tell are very special to these parents as their daughters are getting older. What I love most is that they always wanted to do as much together as a family as possible. I remarked to my husband that night how warm I found them.
Then there were a few that broke my heart. Fathers who would rather nap than take a walk on the beach with their sun. Parents saying "not now" because they were too busy trying to look fabulous and this small person was something the nanny should be dealing with - I actually overheard that comment. Father admonishing his son because he was scared of something his sister wasn't when the father was really only interested in his cell phone the whole time. Mothers complaining how "they need a break" as they are sitting with friends and ignoring their daughters.
For those of you who say I don't have a right to judge, you are right, I don't. But as someone who would give ANYTHING to be "annoyed" by my own child it's difficult to watch people who have been given this beautiful amazing gift to only look inconvenienced. Your child is a child for such a short period of time and you never know what life is going to bring you. All I know is if I am somehow lucky enough to be a parent, I hope I will be like mine - present whenever they need me and not like so many that unfortunately seem to be out there.
Monday, January 14, 2013
Friday, January 4, 2013
A Lesson From the Past Year
Today is a pretty significant day for me in this whole little thing that is my new life. It doesn't matter exactly why but without January 4th of last year, my "new life" probably wouldn't have happened. As I think about that, I am also thinking about how much has changed for everyone around me in the last year and I am pretty excited about all of the changes that are to come in 2013.
In the past year I know people who have found love, lost love, gotten pregnant, given birth, lost a child, gotten a pet, lost a pet, moved, quit their jobs, lost many of their childhood memories and made new memories. I know people who have started businesses, failed businesses, sold a business and lost their businesses to a hurricane. Basically, I like all of you have experienced or know someone who has experienced pretty much every human emotion imaginable over the last twelve months.
This day a year ago I was excited to start a new job but very sad to leave St. Barth, I didn't like the way things went that week but also had a "feeling" about some things. That job wasn't exactly what I was thinking it would be - I ended up in a situation I never thought I would find myself, completely duped with my new boss being arrested very soon into my new gig - he ended up in prison and I ended up having to figure something else out - and FAST. It's a crazy story but without it, the next nine months wouldn't have happened.
This day a year ago, I said goodbye to my now husband and he was in the process of figuring out "us" you see I had already done that, but you know us women are sometimes quicker at coming to the right conclusion ;) He took some time to reflect on what it was he wanted and whether or not "we" were it. So he needed time and a little space.
The past few days I have seen many of the same folks that had dove with my husband a year ago. There was a hint of something in their faces when they saw me - surprise, delight, maybe even shock - they all had a similar reaction, something along the lines of "so, there have been some changes since we last saw each other." My reaction has been something along the lines of "um, yeah a little bit." In general they have all been very warm and seem truly happy for us.
I don't think I am so special - who's life DOESN'T change in a year? Who sits still and doesn't have SOMETHING happen? The thing is - LIFE happens. Sometimes it happens great sometimes it's not so great - but no matter what happens you have to live it. You have to deal with what's happening around you and ask - is this something that I am going to let get me down or am I going to learn/grow/move forward in a new and "better" way.
There were and still are a lot of people out there that think we made a mistake. But there seem to be more and more everyday that believe in us and maybe even give us a bit of credit as they realize that this was not easy. We have been through a lot in the past year. There have been times I wasn't so sure I could do this. At the end it has all been worth it. Every last bit of it. I learned a lot about myself during that time with my old boss and I am learning a lot about myself every day in my new environment. My husband has learned a lot about himself during his time of reflection.
Together we are learning how to be a better team and help each other when we can how we can. I'm very happy about the way things are turning out and I look forward to continuing to grow and learn as a couple and I honestly don't care so much any more about what other think about it all. We are the only two people who opinions really matter in all this so I'm just going to focus on that. We are entering the next stage of our relationship and I can't wait to see what the next 12 months bring.
In the past year I know people who have found love, lost love, gotten pregnant, given birth, lost a child, gotten a pet, lost a pet, moved, quit their jobs, lost many of their childhood memories and made new memories. I know people who have started businesses, failed businesses, sold a business and lost their businesses to a hurricane. Basically, I like all of you have experienced or know someone who has experienced pretty much every human emotion imaginable over the last twelve months.
This day a year ago I was excited to start a new job but very sad to leave St. Barth, I didn't like the way things went that week but also had a "feeling" about some things. That job wasn't exactly what I was thinking it would be - I ended up in a situation I never thought I would find myself, completely duped with my new boss being arrested very soon into my new gig - he ended up in prison and I ended up having to figure something else out - and FAST. It's a crazy story but without it, the next nine months wouldn't have happened.
This day a year ago, I said goodbye to my now husband and he was in the process of figuring out "us" you see I had already done that, but you know us women are sometimes quicker at coming to the right conclusion ;) He took some time to reflect on what it was he wanted and whether or not "we" were it. So he needed time and a little space.
The past few days I have seen many of the same folks that had dove with my husband a year ago. There was a hint of something in their faces when they saw me - surprise, delight, maybe even shock - they all had a similar reaction, something along the lines of "so, there have been some changes since we last saw each other." My reaction has been something along the lines of "um, yeah a little bit." In general they have all been very warm and seem truly happy for us.
I don't think I am so special - who's life DOESN'T change in a year? Who sits still and doesn't have SOMETHING happen? The thing is - LIFE happens. Sometimes it happens great sometimes it's not so great - but no matter what happens you have to live it. You have to deal with what's happening around you and ask - is this something that I am going to let get me down or am I going to learn/grow/move forward in a new and "better" way.
There were and still are a lot of people out there that think we made a mistake. But there seem to be more and more everyday that believe in us and maybe even give us a bit of credit as they realize that this was not easy. We have been through a lot in the past year. There have been times I wasn't so sure I could do this. At the end it has all been worth it. Every last bit of it. I learned a lot about myself during that time with my old boss and I am learning a lot about myself every day in my new environment. My husband has learned a lot about himself during his time of reflection.
Together we are learning how to be a better team and help each other when we can how we can. I'm very happy about the way things are turning out and I look forward to continuing to grow and learn as a couple and I honestly don't care so much any more about what other think about it all. We are the only two people who opinions really matter in all this so I'm just going to focus on that. We are entering the next stage of our relationship and I can't wait to see what the next 12 months bring.
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Tis the Season
Like everything else here, time of year very different from what I am used to "back home." I have actually been waiting for the next two weeks here for a very a long time because from what I hear it's something to see and experience. I have to admit, it's been very hard for me to get into the "Holiday Spirit" this year. Maybe it's the 80 degree temperatures or the lack of constant Christmas music or the barrage of Christmas ads on TV. But it definitely feels like there is something in the air. It's not exactly a Christmas spirit but it's no less alive and very very obvious.
Here the words "The Season" while its very related to Christmas & New Years on the calendar means something completely different. When the rest of the world is celebrating the end of the year, here it's essentially the beginning. The big boats started to arrive a couple of weeks ago but as of this morning, the harbor is almost full. The world largest yacht The Eclipse is here and you hear more English and Russian being spoken than French. "The Season" has officially started - which means this is the St Barth you read about.
It's been amazing to watch the slow transformation from small local community to an island filled with tourists. Most of these tourists aren't your typical tourist, this isn't their first holiday in St Barth and they like to make it clear that they know the Island. When I arrived in early November it was quiet - really really quiet. Not even all the folks that live here had returned from the mass exodus that happens in September & October - the height of hurricane season here. There was Thanksgiving week where we got a sneak peak at what was about to happen, but I can already see it doesn't compare to the next two weeks. Where everything is elevated - there is a "buzz" in the air.
The staffs at restaurants and hotels are increased and the level of service is raised everywhere. I have been watching my husband and his business partner slowly gearing up waiting for what's about to happen. They are already getting the private dives - and have more than one booking a day and the emails and calls are coming in at a quicker pace. For me this is fun to witness as it's the opposite of what I am used to. I'm used to coasting through these two weeks, doing a little work but really catching up on the news and some good books. This year though I am looking forward to making myself useful, if possible, with their business. Whether it's to help them get ready for large groups, answer some emails or just be an extra pair of hands when possible. I will work this holiday season in one way shape or form if I can.
But what's happen around the island, well, it really is something to see. The wealthiest of the wealthy will be here - forget the 1% this is the .001%. To give you context - I said something about Romney and his yacht the other day and the comment I got back was "He's not SO wealthy." Yep, a world where one of the symbols of wealth isn't considered wealthy - that kind of wealth. There are some of the yachts in the harbor cost more than $500 m to build - and they only represent one of the owners toys. Of course not everyone that comes is on a yacht - most rent villas or stay in hotels. But they are still spend a pretty penny to be here these two weeks and it becomes a bit of a playground.
It's such a contrast to my holidays back home. I miss the holiday parties and will certainly miss Christmas Eve at my parents. I won't however miss New Year's Eve in NYC - never was a fan. It's very different, not bad just different. I don't have a Christmas Tree and all my decorations are in a storage unit. And while I used to dream of a "White Christmas" well the white sand beaches are a perfectly acceptable substitute. I am however looking forward to living it as a local, that's what I am now and I think I am finally feeling like one!
Happy Holidays all!!!!!
Here the words "The Season" while its very related to Christmas & New Years on the calendar means something completely different. When the rest of the world is celebrating the end of the year, here it's essentially the beginning. The big boats started to arrive a couple of weeks ago but as of this morning, the harbor is almost full. The world largest yacht The Eclipse is here and you hear more English and Russian being spoken than French. "The Season" has officially started - which means this is the St Barth you read about.
It's been amazing to watch the slow transformation from small local community to an island filled with tourists. Most of these tourists aren't your typical tourist, this isn't their first holiday in St Barth and they like to make it clear that they know the Island. When I arrived in early November it was quiet - really really quiet. Not even all the folks that live here had returned from the mass exodus that happens in September & October - the height of hurricane season here. There was Thanksgiving week where we got a sneak peak at what was about to happen, but I can already see it doesn't compare to the next two weeks. Where everything is elevated - there is a "buzz" in the air.
The staffs at restaurants and hotels are increased and the level of service is raised everywhere. I have been watching my husband and his business partner slowly gearing up waiting for what's about to happen. They are already getting the private dives - and have more than one booking a day and the emails and calls are coming in at a quicker pace. For me this is fun to witness as it's the opposite of what I am used to. I'm used to coasting through these two weeks, doing a little work but really catching up on the news and some good books. This year though I am looking forward to making myself useful, if possible, with their business. Whether it's to help them get ready for large groups, answer some emails or just be an extra pair of hands when possible. I will work this holiday season in one way shape or form if I can.
But what's happen around the island, well, it really is something to see. The wealthiest of the wealthy will be here - forget the 1% this is the .001%. To give you context - I said something about Romney and his yacht the other day and the comment I got back was "He's not SO wealthy." Yep, a world where one of the symbols of wealth isn't considered wealthy - that kind of wealth. There are some of the yachts in the harbor cost more than $500 m to build - and they only represent one of the owners toys. Of course not everyone that comes is on a yacht - most rent villas or stay in hotels. But they are still spend a pretty penny to be here these two weeks and it becomes a bit of a playground.
It's such a contrast to my holidays back home. I miss the holiday parties and will certainly miss Christmas Eve at my parents. I won't however miss New Year's Eve in NYC - never was a fan. It's very different, not bad just different. I don't have a Christmas Tree and all my decorations are in a storage unit. And while I used to dream of a "White Christmas" well the white sand beaches are a perfectly acceptable substitute. I am however looking forward to living it as a local, that's what I am now and I think I am finally feeling like one!
Happy Holidays all!!!!!
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
You Can't Always Get What You Want
But you get what you need. One of the BEST music lines of all time - no question. And since I have enviously been viewing so many Stones pics thought I would throw it in there. Over the last month, I have been missing NY, my friends and my family. I guess that was to be expected but it still took me by surprise. I am currently on a business trip as is usually the case I have had some time to reflect on the VERY LONG flight here and while I lay awake in my massive hotel room. Two years ago if you asked me what I would be doing in two years there is no way I would have ever thought this would be my life. It's not what I THOUGHT I wanted
As it turns out though - it's exactly what I needed and in turn what I want now. It's funny how that happens. What I wanted was a big job, to live in the city forever and maybe have a kid. What I really needed was the exact opposite (except maybe the child part). I needed a break from working the way I was working. I needed to not live to work. I needed, as it turns out, to leave the city in order to appreciate it even more. I needed to slow down and I needed to lose myself a little in order to find myself.
The more I tell little bits of my story and watch peoples reactions the more I realize how very lucky I am. A very random meeting on a beach changed my life forever. Now that all the whirlwind of it is over, this is my new life and I am one lucky lady. I needed the love of a good man to realize I didn't need all of what I have left behind. I needed to slow down and step away to realize, I actually do love to work but I don't need to have THAT job. I just need to like what I am doing and like the people I am doing it with - even if I don't always LOVE it. It's still work but you have to like it in order to appreciate it.
I stepped out of my comfort zone and it hasn't been easy. I am living a very different life than I have lived. It's hard - new country, language and way of life. I would have never in a million years thought leaving the city I loved, the work I thought I thrived on and a lifestyle that was constant go would be the things I didn't need because it's what I wanted. Yet the entire time I have been in San Francisco - a city that love almost as much as New York - I have just wanted to go home and home is now wherever my husband is.
We haven't had an easy month of getting used to living together and altering our lives but these few days apart have made me realize how badly I need my new life. I miss him more right now than I have missed him before. I can't believe for the last year and half we spent so much time apart - it feels wasted now. A note to some of my dear friends that are probably also missing then men they love - you know who you are. Don't waste time, yes you will miss things but I can tell you from being on the other side of this now - its all sooooo worth it. I have everything I need and it's on a tiny island too far away from me right now.
As it turns out though - it's exactly what I needed and in turn what I want now. It's funny how that happens. What I wanted was a big job, to live in the city forever and maybe have a kid. What I really needed was the exact opposite (except maybe the child part). I needed a break from working the way I was working. I needed to not live to work. I needed, as it turns out, to leave the city in order to appreciate it even more. I needed to slow down and I needed to lose myself a little in order to find myself.
The more I tell little bits of my story and watch peoples reactions the more I realize how very lucky I am. A very random meeting on a beach changed my life forever. Now that all the whirlwind of it is over, this is my new life and I am one lucky lady. I needed the love of a good man to realize I didn't need all of what I have left behind. I needed to slow down and step away to realize, I actually do love to work but I don't need to have THAT job. I just need to like what I am doing and like the people I am doing it with - even if I don't always LOVE it. It's still work but you have to like it in order to appreciate it.
I stepped out of my comfort zone and it hasn't been easy. I am living a very different life than I have lived. It's hard - new country, language and way of life. I would have never in a million years thought leaving the city I loved, the work I thought I thrived on and a lifestyle that was constant go would be the things I didn't need because it's what I wanted. Yet the entire time I have been in San Francisco - a city that love almost as much as New York - I have just wanted to go home and home is now wherever my husband is.
We haven't had an easy month of getting used to living together and altering our lives but these few days apart have made me realize how badly I need my new life. I miss him more right now than I have missed him before. I can't believe for the last year and half we spent so much time apart - it feels wasted now. A note to some of my dear friends that are probably also missing then men they love - you know who you are. Don't waste time, yes you will miss things but I can tell you from being on the other side of this now - its all sooooo worth it. I have everything I need and it's on a tiny island too far away from me right now.
Monday, December 3, 2012
Home Sweet Home
Well ok, it's not done yet but little by little we are getting there. This morning I got a great present from my husband - he actually said he liked the changes and the apartment is starting to feel nicer. He has no idea how AWESOME that made me feel. Just three weeks ago almost every suggestion I made was met with a very skeptic look and often followed by a not so subtle reminder that I wasn't allowed to throw anything out. So you can see how this little appreciation made me VERY happy. All I really want is to feel at home.
This comes after a week of ups and downs when it came to us settling into living together. The downs were mostly on my end and mostly due to lack of patience and feeling displaced. The reality is I haven't really had A HOME for the last six months or so. Once I moved out of my apartment, I was splitting time with my parents and here, two places I was very comfortable in but neither were my home. I think this limbo caused me to try and force the issue faster than I should have.
The reality is I am suffering a little from homesickness. This place is gorgeous and peaceful and wonderful but couldn't be more different for me if it was another planet. I'm somewhat isolated in that I work from home so I don't really have any opportunity to meet people other than at the dive center or directly through my husband. That's not me generally. I am outgoing and have always made friends easily so to be somewhere without friends of my own is really tough. I know I have my friends still but I can't call any of them up and grab a glass, ok a bottle of wine with.
I didn't expect that. I mean I knew I would miss people but I was so excited to get here and start our life together I didn't think about everything I was leaving behind. I knew I would miss my family and friends but I didn't realize I how much. It's a lot harder than I thought. Don't get me wrong - not one iota of regret here. I wouldn't change a darn thing (except maybe would have moved sooner).
So it becomes about the apartment and making it a home. Seeing me reflected in it a bit more and just making it little nicer. It started with a vacuum and mop (so boring I know) but today is the first day I really see all the little "upgrades" starting to take shape. It won't happen overnight, but it will happen. I guess the same will go for my adjustment. I won't feel at home here today or tomorrow but soon.
This comes after a week of ups and downs when it came to us settling into living together. The downs were mostly on my end and mostly due to lack of patience and feeling displaced. The reality is I haven't really had A HOME for the last six months or so. Once I moved out of my apartment, I was splitting time with my parents and here, two places I was very comfortable in but neither were my home. I think this limbo caused me to try and force the issue faster than I should have.
The reality is I am suffering a little from homesickness. This place is gorgeous and peaceful and wonderful but couldn't be more different for me if it was another planet. I'm somewhat isolated in that I work from home so I don't really have any opportunity to meet people other than at the dive center or directly through my husband. That's not me generally. I am outgoing and have always made friends easily so to be somewhere without friends of my own is really tough. I know I have my friends still but I can't call any of them up and grab a glass, ok a bottle of wine with.
I didn't expect that. I mean I knew I would miss people but I was so excited to get here and start our life together I didn't think about everything I was leaving behind. I knew I would miss my family and friends but I didn't realize I how much. It's a lot harder than I thought. Don't get me wrong - not one iota of regret here. I wouldn't change a darn thing (except maybe would have moved sooner).
So it becomes about the apartment and making it a home. Seeing me reflected in it a bit more and just making it little nicer. It started with a vacuum and mop (so boring I know) but today is the first day I really see all the little "upgrades" starting to take shape. It won't happen overnight, but it will happen. I guess the same will go for my adjustment. I won't feel at home here today or tomorrow but soon.
Monday, November 26, 2012
Little by Little
I am sitting on my terrace overlooking Gustavia Harbor and am alone and it's quiet and I am fully content. I just completed my first holiday away from what I have called home for so many years. I was indulged by several friends and my husband who all joined me here for my first Thanksgiving and it was really a lovely holiday weekend.
The first two weeks have not been easy as I make my transition from guest to resident. I think my diving experience is a good analogy for what I have been going through. My first time back in the water was rough - there was an unexpected swell and I got tossed around the reef as if I was in the washing machine's spin cycle - for the first time in my life I was really scared in the water. The last few outings however were significantly better - I was comfortable and felt a state of complete bliss.
The same way I got through that first dive is how I got through the last two weeks that had several challenges thrown at me. I survived getting the kitchen and bedroom in order, buying the wrong butter (a mortal sin apparently) and a coconut allergy attack that happened at one of our favorite restaurants that had my skin basically on fire. But we are still learning to live together and roll with life's little adventures.
My mission before the end of the year now is to make this apartment into OUR home. Two men lived here previous to my moving in so it definitely needed woman's touch. Thankfully, I actually enjoy doing a lot of what needs to be done, we have a landlord that is open to making repairs and upgrades without fuss, and although it would be insane to bring MY things here, I have found a few stores that don't rob their clientele blind.
The kitchen and bedrooms are almost complete, the bathrooms have been made to sparkle and the living room - well we'll get to that soon. We are each taking on little things that we don't like to so as to please each other - he does the dishes and I cook food that is not really my favorite all the time. The most important thing is that we really do love each other - and I see it more and more every day - especially when things aren't going smoothly.
So I'll deal with scuba equipment in the living room for a LITTLE while longer and he'll eat some veggies and learn that I'll make a few mistakes when trying to read the french labels. It's what life is all about. Rome wasn't built in a day and this apartment will take some time to get in order. We are apparently a lot more patient than either of us ever thought.
The first two weeks have not been easy as I make my transition from guest to resident. I think my diving experience is a good analogy for what I have been going through. My first time back in the water was rough - there was an unexpected swell and I got tossed around the reef as if I was in the washing machine's spin cycle - for the first time in my life I was really scared in the water. The last few outings however were significantly better - I was comfortable and felt a state of complete bliss.
The same way I got through that first dive is how I got through the last two weeks that had several challenges thrown at me. I survived getting the kitchen and bedroom in order, buying the wrong butter (a mortal sin apparently) and a coconut allergy attack that happened at one of our favorite restaurants that had my skin basically on fire. But we are still learning to live together and roll with life's little adventures.
My mission before the end of the year now is to make this apartment into OUR home. Two men lived here previous to my moving in so it definitely needed woman's touch. Thankfully, I actually enjoy doing a lot of what needs to be done, we have a landlord that is open to making repairs and upgrades without fuss, and although it would be insane to bring MY things here, I have found a few stores that don't rob their clientele blind.
The kitchen and bedrooms are almost complete, the bathrooms have been made to sparkle and the living room - well we'll get to that soon. We are each taking on little things that we don't like to so as to please each other - he does the dishes and I cook food that is not really my favorite all the time. The most important thing is that we really do love each other - and I see it more and more every day - especially when things aren't going smoothly.
So I'll deal with scuba equipment in the living room for a LITTLE while longer and he'll eat some veggies and learn that I'll make a few mistakes when trying to read the french labels. It's what life is all about. Rome wasn't built in a day and this apartment will take some time to get in order. We are apparently a lot more patient than either of us ever thought.
Friday, November 16, 2012
The First Days Are the Hardest Days
Well we made it. My dog and I with the help of a dear friend arrived in St Barth after a long day of traveling and putting once and for all to rest all the things I was having panic attacks about - as it relates to her anyway. I have to give my dog credit - she was a total champ on the plane - not a whimper. Once we got here, she is quickly adapting to a new freedom she never really had. Her mom....well she's trying to learn patience.
I have been so displaced for so long that I guess part of me was hoping I could get here, unpack, run to the store to pick up a few things and voila I would be settled....not so fast. You see like any move, nothing is going quite as smoothly as I would like it. Plus we do actually still have everyday life to contend with. Despite popular belief we both do work - and work a lot more than I thought we would have to. He's getting his business ready for the busiest time of the year, with a new partner and I actually have two clients both at peak times.
I have found myself "nagging" more than I would like to admit. It's not that my husband is actually doing anything wrong, its just that I want to be settled, I want crap put away and I want this place to feel like I actually live here. For those of you unaware - there were two single men living here before I got here so there is a bit to do. Before you all go saying be patient - it's only been a couple of days - I am fully aware that I am being completely irrational. That doesn't mean I am going to be happy about it. My husband's patience with me has been exceptional - and he is NOT a patient person. I think he realizes my nagging and frustration isn't really at him (I hope he does anyway) but more about that this is all very new for me.
While I may not have had the easiest adjustment little miss is adjusting JUST FINE. I was soooo worried she'd hate it, wouldn't listen to Didier, and would be a nervous wreck because let's face it she tends to get nervous. Nope, little miss is seems to be loving life. She loves being off-leash most of the time, she quickly figured out her new routines, and seems to not have a care in the world. She has a playmate and apparently no longer any interest in me when my husband is around. She follows him around like he were a bag of treats. She's a total traitor, and I actually think that is kind of awesome.
Watching her the last two days seem so at home despite the fact that there is no way she actually could understand why this was all happening put a few things into perspective for me. The stuff will eventually get put away, I can go shopping and buy the things I need, and little by little this will feel more like my home. I moved here for a very good reason. It's a great place to live, my life quality is improved, and I love my husband more every day. Today I shop...tonight my husband sees the output - let's see if he still love me so much :)
I have been so displaced for so long that I guess part of me was hoping I could get here, unpack, run to the store to pick up a few things and voila I would be settled....not so fast. You see like any move, nothing is going quite as smoothly as I would like it. Plus we do actually still have everyday life to contend with. Despite popular belief we both do work - and work a lot more than I thought we would have to. He's getting his business ready for the busiest time of the year, with a new partner and I actually have two clients both at peak times.
I have found myself "nagging" more than I would like to admit. It's not that my husband is actually doing anything wrong, its just that I want to be settled, I want crap put away and I want this place to feel like I actually live here. For those of you unaware - there were two single men living here before I got here so there is a bit to do. Before you all go saying be patient - it's only been a couple of days - I am fully aware that I am being completely irrational. That doesn't mean I am going to be happy about it. My husband's patience with me has been exceptional - and he is NOT a patient person. I think he realizes my nagging and frustration isn't really at him (I hope he does anyway) but more about that this is all very new for me.
While I may not have had the easiest adjustment little miss is adjusting JUST FINE. I was soooo worried she'd hate it, wouldn't listen to Didier, and would be a nervous wreck because let's face it she tends to get nervous. Nope, little miss is seems to be loving life. She loves being off-leash most of the time, she quickly figured out her new routines, and seems to not have a care in the world. She has a playmate and apparently no longer any interest in me when my husband is around. She follows him around like he were a bag of treats. She's a total traitor, and I actually think that is kind of awesome.
Watching her the last two days seem so at home despite the fact that there is no way she actually could understand why this was all happening put a few things into perspective for me. The stuff will eventually get put away, I can go shopping and buy the things I need, and little by little this will feel more like my home. I moved here for a very good reason. It's a great place to live, my life quality is improved, and I love my husband more every day. Today I shop...tonight my husband sees the output - let's see if he still love me so much :)
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